Last night’s “Celebrity Apprentice” was billed as “the most explosive ever” and it didn’t disappoint. Clay and Dayanna argued, Aubrey and Arsenio fought…again, Lisa and Dayanna yelled..again. Aside from all the friction (because of it?) this was a highly entertaining episode.
For last night’s task the teams had to create and perform a 90-second jingle to promote Good Sam’s Roadside Assistance Program. Having seen Good Sam, I can see how it would need some promoting!
Dayana took charge as Team Forte’s project manager, Arsenio Hall led Team Unanimous on this one.
The task certainly didn’t start too well but that didn’t matter as most of us were probably more interested in the death glares being passed between Aubrey and Arsenio.
That particular little exchange as won by Aubrey, so Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl” became their theme song. And Dayana felt alienated from her team mates by the 1960s theme. Trying to stamp her (non-existent authority) on proceedings, she handed over her 10 cents about Clay’s songwriting. Uh…I think he’s probably OK with that, Dayana.
So Dayana grassed her team mates up to Don Jr., telling him how they were not allowing her to contribute. This led to an almighty meltdown from Lisa, who stormed out. Aubrey also did her best to dominate her team in a very inappropriate cheerleader outfit. It had the guys in the boardroom perk right up, though.
Friction between Arsenio and Aubrey was inevitable as soon as Arsenio volunteered to be Project Manager on a singing task, wasn’t it? It didn’t take them long. After Arsenio pooped all over Aubrey’s cheerleading idea, she suggested tap dancing.
“As a black man, I’m not tap dancing.”
Say what? But he was not to be persuaded by numerous famous examples. Aubrey’s retaliation left me laughing for about 10 minutes, if somewhat awkwardly:
“Arsenio is the biggest girl on this show, so I don’t know why he doesn’t like tap dancing or wearing cheerleading outfits. We all know he does it at home.”
Can we just pause here a second to recall that Aubrey is playing this show for a charity which supports kids who have been bullied for being gay! GLSEN. I can hear them on the phone now!
Anyway, Arsenio just let Aubrey have her own way, so cheerleading it was. And they got a new routine. And the drumming moved.
So Aubrey was happy, then? No, of course not!
“I don’t know if he has become senile and is suffering from the age he has become and he doesn’t realize, but homeboy is shifty. Grow some balls, dude,” Aubrey told Don Sr.
Because he’s like…ancient…yeah. Sigh.
The less said about Arsenio’s rapping, the better for us all and we can just move on to a happy place.
But he probably knows more about jingles than Dayana does. She thought they were something to do with Christmas; ‘jingle bells’ and all that…
What followed was a lot of discussion (arguing) about which decade to set it in.
Oh and we handed sorted out Dayana’s Christmas confusion, obviously. She continued by chanting “ho, ho” while snapping her fingers. She’s no human beatbox, though, so for some reason she asked if she could make it like Duran Duran. Because they are so famous for their jingles…?
Thankfully, she eventually agreed to go with the ‘60s theme. She wanted to go with the colors pink and yellow too. For a jingle. I don’t know how you do that but that’s what she wanted. She also demanded they use the phrase “back on track” in their jingle. I know. Mad as a fish!
And the biggest blowup of the episode was from Lisa. It all started when Dayana didn’t give Lisa the credit she thought she deserved to Don Jr. Then Dayan went on to say that Lisa was “as loud as possible.”
That was enough for Lisa.
“I can’t take your bulls—! I am sick of this s—, and you know what? To have you bring that in, you’re a little f—ing bitch!”
And just as we were getting to enjoy the floor show, Lisa stormed off. She came back, though. But no calmer. She demanded an apology. She got one, but it was not exactly sincere, so Lisa went nuts again. Even Clay got upset with Dayana, calling her “the most frustrating person I have ever met in my life.”
“I spent years teaching kids with disabilities and never have I had to draw on that type of patience since I’ve been in a classroom more than I did this task.”
Personally I thought Clay’s outburst was uncalled for. But I gues it was entertaining.
Dayana had to know that she was in for more harsh words in the Boardroom, but that didn’t stop her going on about Lisa.
“I’ve never had to deal with such a person that is so insulting and so disrespectful,” she said. “Insulting people in a working environment is something that I would never understand and could never accept.”
That just sent Lisa into meltdown. Some of the funniest/weirdest/nastiest things she said were:
“Why don’t you write up a memo and I’ll try to become a huge failure by listening to how you work.”
“She is the female Lou Ferrigno and I object to that.”
“This is not Celebrity Miss Universe. This is Celebrity Apprentice, honey. So if you can’t hang with the big boys, I suggest you don’t talk so much.”
There don’t seem to be too many big boys left to hang with on this show, though, do there?
Dayana did fight back a bit, asking “How many languages do you speak, Lisa? You are an adult woman. I’ve never seen a woman cry so much.”
But it was inevitable. Dayana hadn’t the celebrity firepower nor the mental instability to last any longer on this show.
The task was eventually won by Team Unanimous so Arsenio won $45,000 plus the proceeds from the jingle for his charity, The Magic Johnson Foundation.
Lisa and Clay teamed up in the boardroom to let Mr. Trump know how much they hate Dayana. It seems he does too as he fired her.
Was Dayana’s exit this week a shock to you?